Emin

When I was 6 and had just started in elementary school, I made friends with a boy from Bosnia, Emin. Our friendship grew quickly and we become best friends. Emin knew another boy from Bosnia in the same year as us. I have forgotten his name, but the three of us often played together. Prominent in my memory is one winter day when the other Bosnian boy and I visited Emin and went sledging. I can clearly remember the feeling of freedom that careering down the hill created in the carefree mind of a child. Not long afterwards, the young Bosnian and his family were deported. Back home in Bosnia, when he was out playing one day, perhaps with the same feeling and mindset I had had when we were sledging, he ran out in front of a bus and was killed. Back home in Denmark, Emin and I carried on playing together until one day Emin had to move. We lost touch, and once again I had lost a friend.

Out Over The Meadow

‘Sorgenfri’ (‘Carefree’) is the name of the place where my father – and later on I – grew up. On each side of the farm are the fields where a couple of horses and cows are grazing. Down by the end of the hill, in front of the house, is the brook that snakes its way through the landscape. The meadow surrounds the brook and is covered in grass and flowers. Here and there you see a tall tree breaking the meadow’s surface. On the other side of the brook sheep are grazing. They almost look like small, white clouds on the green landscape. You will find me standing up in the farmhouse looking at this scenery. I am wondering what thoughts must have been thought right here over the years. First my grandparents, then my parents, and now me. There have been thoughts about everything and thoughts about nothing, about sorrow and about happiness – but hopefully the good thoughts have outweighed the bad ones. It is here on the farm, ‘Sorgenfri’, that the farmhouse window sets the frame for the view, ‘Out over the meadow’.

Lullaby For Emma

It is Tuesday afternoon and the small coffin is waiting in the chapel. The lid has been fixed and this world’s light has lit up Emma’s face for the last time. Instead, the sun is now shining bright through the windows of the chapel on the white coffin. Encapsulated in the light of the sun, surrounded by flowers and silken greetings, she is ready to take her leave. In sharp contrast to the smouldering sun and the cascades of colourful flowers we have the grieving family. Some are crying, some in despair, some uncomprehending. In the midst of all of this is me. Eleven years old, struck by the situation without fully being able to comprehend what is actually going on. I knew very well what a funeral was and what it meant to be dead. On the other hand, I had no idea emotionally what it meant for a family to lose a child.

Homebound

The Bible talks about mankind’s life on Earth as a journey towards our real home on the new Earth. A place you only get a glimpse of through the stories in the Bible. During a period in my life I had this feeling of being on my way to finding my real home. It was not necessarily related to a physical setting, but more a ‘journey home’ – a stage where I felt at home within myself. That journey, and that home, is forever changeable. It will be rebuilt and added to many times in a lifetime. To find peace and quiet within myself, to be on my way home, is essential for me. It is a lifelong journey to furnish and rearrange my inner home so that at the end of the day I can settle down in my comfy chair with a nice cup of coffee. For me this process contains many facets and a whole range of emotions. In ‘Homebound’ I have tried to encapsulate some of these facets and emotions in a musical context.

Winter Is Coming

To me winter is in itself a world of opposites. Winter can be beautiful landscapes covered in snow, fire in the fireplace, sledging, and steaming hot coffee enjoyed with your family. On the other hand, winter can be the cold, the icy roads covered in snow, the darkness and a sky covered with grey clouds. There are a wide variety of experiences in life that, figuratively speaking, belong to winter. This song is an expression of a tough winter coming. Perhaps it is the late autumn of a human life, where grey, snow-filled clouds can be discerned on the horizon. Perhaps it is the sense of a period of cold, ice and darkness lying ahead before you once again can discern the new life of spring revealing itself. Whether this winter will be your last or just one of many seasons to come, this song portrays the melancholic atmosphere of a dark, cold winter.

Old Friendship

I picture myself as an old man. Perhaps I am sitting in a nursing home, perhaps sitting at home in my living room, or perhaps I am in hospital facing my days’ end. Either way, one of my very old friends is there visiting me. We look back and remember the good old days. We talk about our lives and what we have each experienced. After a while we remember all the experiences we have shared. We laugh and enjoy our reunion with the good old days. We also talk about all our mutual friends who have passed away before us and the experiences we shared with them. At the same time, we know that our turn is soon to come. Nevertheless, the mood is not that of a sad end. We have both come to terms with things and are grateful for what we have shared and experienced together. Hopefully, that will be the way I will remember the good old days – grateful for what I have had and experienced and not sad about the end that is nigh.

Little Lullaby

One evening Benjamin and I were jamming. We were both tired and could barely keep focused on the music and each other. What music we could muster was on the brink of falling apart. Out of this fragility two short melodies arose that together made a little lullaby.

Suffering Mammoth

Both Troels and I have a common understanding and respect for each other as musicians and human beings. This common trust creates a space where exploration and curiosity are the mainstays. When we create music together, we try to stay in this space and let creativity take over. ”Suffering Mammoth” was created in this space. This and ”Little lullaby” are the only two songs on the record which are more an expression of an unspecified atmosphere than they are actual stories.

A Song For Grandma

On my way home from the supermarket I find myself humming. Before I reach home a little melody has got stuck in my head. Singing this melody gives me a feeling of both beauty and sadness. Subconsciously, this melody has been influenced by my girlfriend’s grandma. Within the last few months she has become very sick and is nearing her days’ end. We have already visited her a couple of times and clearly this is affecting my girlfriend. I cannot help but be affected by the situation myself. In the course of her illness, this little melody turns into a whole song. I speak to Benjamin and tell him that I want to dedicate this song to my girlfriend’s grandma. The melody and the vibe remind me of an old lady taking her last breath. Both sad and beautiful. As a last gesture to my girlfriend’s grandma and her family, I perform the song at her funeral.